Love In Reverse
by WishIHadATimeTurner
Summary: is exactly what happens with Celeste Cooper and Neville Longbottom, two former classmates from Hogwarts, when they are matched by the Ministry and forced to wed. Neither of them planned to marry, nor were they expecting what starts to happen during the course of the marriage period..How will this work, especially when the two are literally polar opposites almost? (READ NOTES)
1. Matched

**Normally I post notes at the end of the story, however with this story being what it is, and people being picky on occasion, I figured I had some 'splainin to do.. First of all, I don't own Harry Potter or any of it's canonverse characters events pairings etc.. If I did, Fred wouldn't be dead and Neville would be mine! Those all belong to the amazing lady JK Rowling. I'm just dicking around with things here in the hopes of writing something that's a little fun, a little racy and for the most part hopefully an all around entertaining read.**

 **The above being said, the pairing is Neville x OC.. Yes, I know he married Hannah Abbott.. But what if the ministry had passed a Marriage Law after the war ended? This is where my original character Celeste (for more on her see my profile and stuff) comes into play. She's fled to America, her family was forced to live on the run because her father was a Pureblood and his parents were Pureblood assholes like so many other Pureblood families were during that time and they'd disowned Celeste's father when he married her mother and had children.. So when the war began, they put targets on Celeste and her family because of her father's 'betrayal' of the family's good name..**

 **Make any sort of sense? Probably not, but my weird brain comes up with weird shit, so yeah.. Anyway, getting back to where I was at..**

 **All other canon pairings for the most part are true.. And Neville is still the Herbology professor at Hogwarts.. The only thing here is that he's much younger than I believe he was in the actual series when he took the post as Hogwarts professor (Nobody quote me on that, I'm an idiot and often wrong on many different things. If I'm wrong I apologize.) This is just a post war marriage law love story for Neville.. Because he's sexy and sweet and I wanted to do it.**

 **I warn you guys now.. Good chance that Neville will be OOC in some instances.. Just to sort of make things a little interesting and sexy.. I'm sort of writing this as fun as I can, okay? There will most likely be sexual situations at some point in the story. There will be swearing and stuff too. And fluff.. Tons and tons of fluff.**

 **Okay, so now that all that's done, ladies and gents.. Any interest in me writing a Fred x OC post war/marriage law fanfiction? Because I have a few ideas for one, this one chapter for this one about Neville just came to me much faster? And this one chapter for this story is ALL i have so far so if you guys want more.. :P**

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ONE

~ NEVILLE ~

I groaned internally almost as soon as I opened the Daily Prophet and read the article attached to the headline splashed in bold black print across the front. I waved the bartender over and signalled for another dozen shots of Firewhiskey. I'm not normally a drinker but when you open the newspaper and discover that yes, you're now apparently going to be forced to marry a person you've been matched off with and probably hardly know to begin with, yes.. It will drive a sober man to drink. My mind was already formulating all these positively horrid and nerve wracking scenarios and I found my eyes scanning further, reading each and every detail about the article.

I silently hoped that maybe in light of my contributions to the war efforts not so long ago that I'd be excluded. A little further into the article, I realized that there was a list of witches and wizards to be paired as well as the date they must be married by to escape penalty and punishment at the hands of the Ministry of Magic.

Seamus Finnigan, an old school mate of mine slid onto the wooden stool adjacent to mine right as I finished the fourth shot of Firewhiskey and grimaced. I'll have indigestion later I'm almost certain. I grumbled hello and he studied me in partial concern as he asked me with a lopsided grin, "Wot's a matter, Longbottom, looks like yer entire life is ruined."

It was just then that I found the L's and found my name since they'd listed in the order of male spouse for the article. I scanned, past names of former schoolmates, anxiety blooming and turning to dread and yeah, I was a little pissed.

All the while, Seamus sat there watching me. If he tried to speak I held up a finger. Finally, I found it.. My own surname.. My eyes darted across and I gaped when I saw the name beside it. "Bloody hell." I finally managed to murmur.

Finally, I looked up at Seamus and held up the newspaper and muttered darkly, "Of course you've nothin to worry about Finnigan, you've got Lavendar."

Seamus gave a bright boyish grin and pretended to mop sweat from his forehead. "Well? Who is she? Who's te lucky lass tat's goin ta be Mrs. Neville Longbottom?" he asked as I looked back down at the name again just to double check.

Oh, I had no reason to dread her.. But I was mortified. You see the girl they've paired me off with?

Only the biggest crush I had during my years at Hogwarts.. A girl that there is this sort of unfinished moment between the two of us.. She was going to tell me something one night about a month before the battle happened. She never got to because I sort of ruined the mood. It really didn't matter at the time it turned out because I didn't see her again. But I've often wondered if maybe she weren't being serious..

I found out she's living in the States now, some place called Las Vegas. Seamus took Lavendar there about the middle of last year, he said it's even more insane than our world is to outsiders. But that he enjoyed it. Lavendar is the one who talked to Celeste, they knew each other or something and naturally, Lavendar revealed everything she knew about Celeste and her life now.

I held out the paper as I took a deep breath and raked my hand through my hair as I waited. He chuckled, clapped me on the shoulder and then said with a bright eyed grin, "Ye, mate.. Yer in fer it. She's gone off and gotten herself all immersed in the Muggle ways.. Even works at one of those little places where people go to drink, she's one of ta dancers."

My head pivoted to look at him fully and I sipped another shot, grimacing again as I asked "Explain?"

"In her knickers, Longbottom, ruddy 'ell.. Are ye really tat dense?"

My eyes got probably as wide as saucers I'm sure of it and I choked on the damned Firewhiskey, it went everywhere. Seamus grumbled and wiped away the little that'd gotten on him and then raised a brow at me, shrugged.

"Te lass ain't a bad singer either. Or dancer." Seamus said with a wry grin, I suspect he mostly did this to get some form of reaction out of me. Which he did when I rolled up my newspaper and smacked him lazily in the back of the head with it then said, "I don't see why we have to do this, follow this bloody decree. The idiots in charge now must really think we're never going to surge as a population. I have teaching duties, I mean how the hell am I going to do this?"

"Ye better start comin up wit a way, Longbottom.. Because the ones who tried dodgin te law? Went to Azkaban."

I cringed outwardly. Azkaban isn't somewhere I want to go.

But how do I get Celeste to come back here willingly.. I mean she had to go into hiding and the war took away almost her entire family I've heard..

I sighed and raked my hand over my hair again. It's going to be one long bloody night.

~ CELESTE ~

My shift was over and all I was thinking about was going back to my little apartment on campus and falling asleep for probably a week. Finals were hell and to top it off, I've been busting my ass trying to get the internship I wanted lined up for the fall as well as practicing night and day for this ballroom dance competition I've entered.

Nothing about my old life, the ways I left behind was present in this new life and identity I'd built here in Las Vegas. I liked it that way really. All the old me remembered was pain and fear, loss. I left all that behind, I shed it like an old skin when I realized that thanks to my father's parents my entire family was now being hunted by Death Eaters and we were all going to have to go our separate ways and live on the run.

The absolute last thing I wanted was anything from that life popping up, crisscrossing with this new life I'd carefully built. But as I pushed open the door to my apartment, I saw it. The owl sat there on my dinette table with the official Ministry marked envelope clutched in it's beak, waiting patiently for my return, for me to read the documents.

I grumbled and slid my feet out of the black stilettos, shedding them by the door about the same time that he appeared in my living room out of the old and non working fireplace. I paused in mid pull, I'd been about to pull off the black one shouldered sweater dress I'd been wearing home, a new one I was quite partial to, truth be told... All I could do was sort of stare as my mouth fell open and my hand dragged slowly through my long dark hair, a series of noises that sounded really, really awkward coming from my lips as I did so.

"Neville?" I gasped out.

Neville's hand was over his eyes, he obviously thought that I'd undressed.

"You can uncover your face."

His hand lowered, those green eyes of his -the same ones that always sort of made my knees feel a little wonky when we were in school together- locked on my light brown eyes and I bit my lower lip, dragged my teeth along it.

"What are you doing here?"

"Where the hell are your pants, woman?" Neville asked, a commanding tone I imagine that he used quite often with his Herbology students, as he eyed me.

"This is a dress. And you didn't answer my question to begin with, Neville. What on Earth are you doing here?" I asked, a little edgy yet all in the same excited and a little turned on.. I wasn't talking to Neville of old, I was talking to an older Neville.. One who seemed more confident somehow. One who seemed a little more assertive.

I didn't know how to react to this side of Neville Longbottom as I'd never seen it. I only knew the kind hearted boy.

"I'm here, Celeste.." he paused to take a few deep breaths as if what he were about to say might just get him slapped or something, shades of the former Neville Longbottom, the awkward and kind hearted boy I'd secretly been in love with when I was younger coming through as he fidgeted and fumbled awkwardly before finally managing to explain, "Because the Ministry has apparently matched us to be married. Have you not heard, Celeste?"

"Obviously not."

Suddenly I remembered the owl's presence and I nudged past Neville, an electric jolt passing through my entire body as our bodies brushed and I felt well chiseled muscles beneath the softness of the sweater vest he wore. I licked my lips when he wasn't looking and pinched myself.. Was I dreaming?

 _I did have the tendency to have really, really wild and passionate dreams,_ I reminded myself, and _I had drank at least one screwdriver before I left the club a few hours ago._ I flinched a little when the pinch I'd given myself hurt like hell.

I grabbed for the Ministry stamped envelope and tore it open, my eyes scanned it, widened as my mouth fell open.

I think the only intelligible thing I said for at least five minutes -which is beyond rare for me- was "Oh.."

Neville paced too, watching me.. Then he'd grumble, shake his head, start to pace all over again as if he were trying to figure this all out before I ever really got a proper say so.

"Those damned prats. They think they can bloody command me.." I started, the anger rising a little while deeper down other parts of me couldn't help but think, _'Neville is the one boy you've always sort of just longed for but were afraid to try and reveal your true feelings to.. And if you hadn't had to go into hiding and live on the run, Celeste.. You almost told him that night before your parents took you and your sister and brother out of Hogwarts, the night in the towers.. You almost bloody kissed him, Celeste.'_

"So you're angry too?"

"A little, yes. I never.. I didn't plan on going back. Even if I had children at some point. I'd have raised them Muggle. Like my mum was raised." I said in a quiet tone. Neville nodded and then asked in an almost whisperquiet voice, "It's because it's me.. Isn't it?"

I gaped at him and it hit me.. He had not a single clue what I was going to tell him that night in the towers. All he knew was that someone with the initial C sent him a note during one of our few shared classes asking him to meet her there.

And when he saw me that night, he got a little angry and defensive, he accused me of playing a cruel joke.

"Not at all, actually." I admitted.

He looked up from staring a hole through those large and rough calloused hands of his and gaped at me, tried to puzzle that one out. I stood and said casually, "I'm going to have some green tea. Do you want some, Neville, or..."

"Huh? Green tea.. Yeah, I reckon." he said in a shocked tone of voice as he watched me slink out of the room. Once I was in the kitchen, I busied myself making tea for us. My hands were shaking so that I spilled water at least twice but I took a few deep breaths. I peeked out into the living room, saw him wandering around, looking at my photos, my other things that I've sort of collected in this new life of mine.

He'd just picked up the poster advertising me as a dancer at the little burlesque club I dance at and I coughed from behind him as I stepped into the room. "It's a burlesque club.. Turns out my grandmum.. She was a dancer like that in the forties. It's not so bad."

"This.. It's even less than the dress. Bloody hell." Neville muttered as he coughed and hurriedly put down the framed poster where it sat leaned against the bright turquoise painted wall.

I laughed and shrugged then asked, "Really, Neville, when have I ever been afraid to show off?"

He looked at me a few moments as if he were thinking about something, started to say it and then fell silent again. Finally he said "Never, I suppose."

"Well then, Neville, it shouldn't surprise you. I mean I was never the 'good little girl'." I mused aloud as I stopped in front of him, held out the tea glass. He took it, I sipped my own and looked up at him, remarked casually, "You've gone off and gotten taller."

"And you've apparently shrunken."

I gaped at him now, as far as I'd known, he didn't know a thing about me.. Other than the attempt I made at revealing my feelings to him only to have him accuse me of it being some sort of prank. I shrugged and nodded to the stilettos by the door and then said with a laugh, " Not really. I've always been this short.. Just hard to tell when I'm never without a pair of heels."

He thought for a few moments and nodded. "I remember that."

Again, I gaped.

"So.. What do we do about this?" I asked casually, trying to broach the subject of the elephant in the room, wanting to do it carefully while sort of curious.. Did he WANT to be forced to marry me?

I didn't want to be forced to marry, I'd rather not..

But I can't say I honestly didn't want to marry Neville. He's such a sweet and gentle person, he can be brave and strong when he has to. I mean think about it.. If YOU had to marry someone you've sort of always wanted.. You wouldn't mind it so much, right?

But the fact remained.. We were being thrown into this situation and to be quite honest, we didn't actually know one another.. We knew of each other, from our years at Hogwarts.. But we didn't know each other in that way that people who get to choose their spouses do..

"Finnigan.. He told me that if we try and dodge it we get imprisonment in Azkaban." Neville muttered a few moments later but spoke up to add, "Makes no bloody sense to me.. I'm the Herbology professor for Merlin sakes.. Just how do I marry and keep teaching?"

"And I'm going to college, trying to become a nurse.. Not to mention I've got two jobs.." I muttered quietly, biting my lower lip.. Did his saying that mean he didn't want to have to marry me? My stomach sort of fluttered nervously.

"I mean it's not that I don't.." he started, shaking his head, falling silent again, going back to staring at his hands.

My pulse sped up a little.

He looked up, his eyes locked on mine intently. I held his gaze and neither one of us spoke. Then finally, I cleared my throat and said " Me either.."

"I just don't want to be forced to marry someone." we said at the exact same time.

"But if we don't, Neville, we're prison bound. And prison, Muggle or Wizarding.. It's not somewhere I aim to go." I said finally as I finished the last of my tea.

"Me either, Celeste."

"So.. We're doing this?"

"We are, I suppose." Neville answered after about ten seconds of total silence, adding quickly, "It bugs me, you know.. There's a proper way for these bloody things to happen, there's an order to all of it. They're taking the order and the good parts away."

I nodded, I could understand what he was implying, they were taking the thrill of the chase away from us. They were basically demanding we marry, like or not.. They were robbing us of the choice to choose who and when we wanted.

But I was truthfully thrilled with who I'd been matched to.

I worried that maybe Neville wasn't. I've never been a particularly under confident girl, but.. Knowing the one boy you've sort of always been aware of, felt this strong infatuation for.. Knowing that he might not have ever even considered you at all.. It definitely doesn't do much for a girls confidence.

"I mean I can't say I.. Nevermind." Neville started, his voice trailed off, he fell totally silent as his face turned this almost vibrant shade of red.. It was almost the same shade of red as my favorite article of lingerie.

The train of thought made me almost double over in laughter and he looked over at me, puzzled. I managed to admit, "Your face.."

"What about it?" he asked defensively.

"It's.. You're blushing, I can't.. It's so cute." I laughed as tears started to sting at my eyes from laughing. I finally took three short breaths and made myself stop. He was glaring at me, brow raised, not amused.

I stood and then said quietly, "I'm hungry.. Are you hungry?"

He nodded a little. As I walked out of the room again, mostly to get away from the overall awkwardness of this situation that we found ourselves in now thanks to the Ministry and the bumbling bands of idiots running it.. I felt him staring at me intently.

I turned slightly and our eyes met.

I held his gaze again.

And then I hurried into the kitchen and dug up some left over stew I had from the night before. As I heated it in the microwave, I heard his throat clear from the doorway and turned, found myself chest to chest with him literally I was smushed against him, my kitchen is a joke as far as space goes.

"Why aren't you angrier about this? I'd think that with it being me.." he suggested, studying me intently, that firm look in his eyes again. For a few moments this old dream I used to have about him came back to me and I bit my lower lip as I fumbled for words..

"I'm not as angry about this as you seem to be Neville, because it's you." I admitted finally, my words coming out in a rush. He gaped at me and the microwave went off. It startled him and I laughed and nodded my head to the Muggle appliance. "It's just the microwave, silly man. I didn't think you'd want cold soup after having to come all this way."

"Oh.. But what you just said.."

"Is what it meant. If you want to believe me, fine. If not, not really my problem." I said as I gave him a spoon, the bowl of soup I'd heated up for him and then grabbed a spoon for myself and my bowl of soup. I walked into my living room, sat down and turned on my television, eating quietly.

Neville stood in the kitchen for what had to have been at least ten minutes and finally, he walked out, sat down and started to eat too.

"You can't.. And my teaching position."

I muted the television set and then said through a mouth full, "I wouldn't make you quit."

He nodded, a relieved look washed over him and then he asked, "So.. You'll be coming back with me?"

I thought it over a few moments. I'd sworn to myself I'd never go back to that world.. But if I didn't I'd be going to Azkaban. And I was getting Neville out of the deal.. I could finally show him just how much I wanted him and cared for him after all this time..

I sighed and grumbled quietly, "I will."

He managed a smile then apologized for me having to come back. I shrugged it off.

Inside I worried that maybe he didn't want to be married to me. What would happen, I wondered, when the decree was lifted in a few years?

I wasn't so sure I was going to just be able to walk away unscathed, even if he didn't want to remain married to me.

I could tell he had a lot on his mind too.. I just didn't realize that true to form, Neville was still as unaware as ever.. That he still thought my previous statement about not being angry about the law because it was him I was paired with was just me being sarcastic or making a joke or pretending to be okay with it.

All I did know was that for some strange reason.. This arrangement we found ourselves in didn't feel entirely bad..


	2. Long Night

**OMG I had a reviewer! Thanks so much for taking the time to review. I've written another chapter to it, I hope you like it! I'm sorry if this sort of moves slowly or is slightly OOC at times. I'm sort of trying to merge the shy and sweet Neville with the brave and confident young man that I feel he became by Deathly Hallow's end. Hopefully, it's not making anyone angry or less likely to read it.**

 **Okay, so now that all that's done, ladies and gents.. Any interest in me writing a Fred x OC post war/marriage law fanfiction? Because I have a few ideas for one, this one chapter for this one about Neville just came to me much faster? And this newest chapter for this story is ALL i have so far so if you guys want more.. :P**

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TWO

~NEVILLE~

She tapped my shoulder just as I'd taken off my button down and sweater vest and was trying to make myself comfortable on a couch that was most certainly not my size. I don't know how more than one person sits on a couch this size, honestly, and I'd been wondering just how sleeping on the couch, at least for a few nights was going to work out.

I took the blankets and pillows in her hands and she stared at me a few moments, almost like she wanted to say something but she wasn't entirely sure she wanted to say it. "What's wrong?" I asked, eying her. She's probably not comfortable, me being here. She barely knew me then. I barely knew her then.

I've got the sneaking suspicion that isn't what she wants to say at all. I raked my hand across the back of my neck as my eyes darted downward, an old nervous habit of mine, and instead of landing on my feet they landed on long and shapely legs.

 _Dancers legs_ , I thought dumbly as I sort of just gaped at her a few moments. She's no more fond of actual clothing now than she was during our school years I see, she always had these altered uniforms, drove the professors and Dumbledore mad with them she did. They weren't bad, they just.. They made her come across as older than she really was back then which opened her up to a lot of rumors and things. Now though, we're both normal adults.. Her standing here in front of me in just a long and oversized button down shirt that looks like one that mysteriously vanished from my things while we were still students at Hogwarts...

It shouldn't have the effect on me that it is, but it does. I mentally kick myself for gaping at her like an idiot and awkwardly I cough to clear the bludger sized knot that was forming in my throat as we stood there.

"The couch.. It folds out into a bed. It's called a futon." she muttered politely.

I finally realized that she was hinting that maybe I needed to move out of her way and with a laugh I muttered sheepishly, "Sorry, I'll move."

I moved to this chair sitting near the window, watched her as she unfolded the couch that a few moments prior seemed too small to sleep on and it actually made a decently sized bed. She'd just started putting a silky black and white printed sheet set on it, err, damask I think, my grandmum had these dreadful curtains of the same thing all over the house.. Hers were faded orangeish pink or something.. The sheets that Celeste was putting onto the couchbed looked much more sophisticated or something, definitely expensive, definitely not like my grandmum's drapes.

I mentally kicked myself again when my eyes started to wander and left her legs. I felt the blood rushing to my cheeks, I mean I've never really gotten on well with a girl before, not enough to look at them without seeming weird or creepy or like a stalker.. Or that's how I felt about it.

She didn't seem to acknowledge that I was staring at her and pretty hard too, I mean I had to have been.

I diverted my eyes to look out the window I sat next to.

She cleared her throat and then said quietly, a soft and slightly sleepy voice, "Your bed is ready." as she gestured to the couch and added almost apologetically, "It's not the Ritz or the Hilton but it'll work for a week or two." before moving to go into the kitchen.

We found ourselves chest to chest again, _this apartment is so small_ I wonder to myself as I'm sort of internally freaking out about how soft her body feels against me, how soft her hair is because it's brushing my bare arm.. I wonder to myself how she even moves round in it without feeling claustrophobic.

I've been here a few hours now and I already feel as if the walls have closed in.

"Sorry, I was just going into the kitchen.."

"It's okay, I should have moved.."

Drat! All of this is supremely awkward.

She stepped around me and slunk into the kitchen, coming back a few moments later with a bottle of some kind. She's sipping from it. I eyed the bottle and she said with an amused laugh and a shake of her head, "You don't want this, Longbottom. You can hardly tolerate butterbeer if memory serves."

"Maybe, Celeste, I'm not the same person I used to be." I mumbled darkly, holding her gaze. She walked towards me slowly, and when she stood in front of me, she held out the bottle and then said "Strawberry wine."

It can't be too bad, it's made of strawberries. But I was wrong, it was bittersweet. It didn't have the burn of Firewhiskey and the bubbles of the bottles deep red contents sort of tickled my throat going down, but it most definitely was not something I'd habitually drink.

I eyed her in slight concern.

"I'm not a little girl anymore either." she retorted, this cheeky sort of smile on her face as she took the bottle back and took a bigger gulp.

Was I really going to drive the poor girl into the bottle, I wondered to myself before blurting it out. She stared at me a few moments and then said quietly, "It's not you. Helps me sleep some nights when I can't."

I nodded. I can understand why she'd have a hard time sleeping. I mean the war was hell for lots of people. It's effected us all.

"Ahh." I said, mostly for the lack of a proper reaction.

She gave me this sort of soft and amused smile and raised to her tiptoes, fluffed my hair and then said with a yawn, "I have to get up early. Have to go into the club and explain to Vinnie why I'm quitting."

"Do you really like it? Working there I mean.. Lavendar and Seamus told me about it."

"It's not so bad, Neville.. You just have to have practically no inhibitions. And I highly doubt it's anything like whatever Lavendar told you. She's always been a friend but she's been known to slightly stretch the truth." she mused after a few moments.

 _'Yes, well.. She also seemed concerned about you, Celeste_. _Enough so that she sat me down and told me everything, dropped a few hints about that night in the tower.. Enough to make me wonder if you weren't being one hundred percent serious as opposed to being mean or trying to play a cruel prank on me like I thought back then. Enough so that she made sure I knew that you asked about me when you two saw each other and were catching up.'_ I thought to myself but kept quiet instead. And it hit me then, neither of us have actually brought up the night in the towers.. I should have then, it probably would have made everything go so much more smoothly.. But I didn't.

Typical, right?

All I did was nod. She stared at me a few moments, this sort of smoldering and intense look in her light brown eyes and then she turned and walked down the hallway, into a room that I'm guessing must have been her bedroom. A few moments later, music turned on, a Muggle band I'd reckon, and I've been lying here trying NOT to imagine her lying in there for the better part of almost half the night now..

~CELESTE~

I collapsed across my bed and let out one long deep breath. Today has definitely been more interesting than most, I mean I woke up this morning at a little before 6 am, a single college girl who was worried about paying her rent and her tuition. It's a little after midnight now and I'm promised to a man, we have to marry or we'll face being imprisoned. Not only that, I have to move.. I have to go back to a life I left behind a few years ago and swore with everything inside me I would never return to because that way of life got my family taken from me and it left me alone.

And now, from the looks of it, I'll have to go back to it. I'm lying here wondering just how I'm going to adjust to this, being a promised woman, I mean this.. They're taking away Neville's right to choose.. And they're taking away my right to be chosen.. Or vice versa. And there's all this frustration over the situation.

I rolled over onto my stomach and sighed to myself as I looked at the time on my alarm clock. I have a long day ahead of me tomorrow. And I haven't even thought of the best way to explain the situation without sounding legitimately insane.

That thought made me laugh quietly. How do you explain to people who have only known you one way and not the real you, 'Oh and by the way, I'm a witch.. And we have our own little society or something.. And they've decided to pass a law that requires all single witches and wizards to be matched up and married off.' without them coming away from the conversation thinking you're losing your grip with reality.

And in the back of my mind I'm lying here torn between happiness and dread. I'm happy because it's Neville. I dread this whole thing because Neville just seems to act as if he'd really rather not be paired with me. And it irritates me because stuff like this normally doesn't even bother me, I can pretty much ignore anything that makes me upset, I've never been good with emotional stuff so it's no effort to shove how I really feel about something down until I finally forget it.

And I thought I'd forgotten how I felt about Neville, how intense it was then. But his showing up here today, his sleeping right this very minute on my futon in the living room, right within my reach.. It proved me otherwise.

I dread the end of the alotted time period too. What if I actually let myself fall in love even more with Neville?

What if I realize that he'd rather eat glass than be married to me and wants to end the whole thing the second the law is lifted in a few years?

I grumbled and shoved my head beneath the pillow. The bathroom door closes and I hear the shower turn on and I groan inwardly. And now I'm going to have to lie here and try not picturing him in my shower. Or how he looked earlier when I saw him again after all this time, the way nothing changed yet everything had.

I slid out of bed and quietly made my way down the hall, into the kitchen. I'd just finished off a glass of water and was walking back to my room when Neville stepped out of the bathroom, shirtless and in the khaki pants he'd been wearing. I felt my throat closing up and a slow heat filling my body, I was probably blushing all over, for some reason he's always pretty much been the only person I know who makes me into the mess he makes me into, but yes.. I was probably blushing head to toe as I stood there in front of him in a shirt that he probably has no idea I got my friend Seamus to steal for me during a pretty wild game of Truth or Dare back during school.

The scent of his cologne has faded now, of course and several attempts to emulate the specific scents and that particular cologne have failed miserably, but yes, it is definitely one of Neville's old shirts from school.

He eyed me, a concerned look in his eyes. "Everything alright?"

"Fine, I was just thirsty." I lied, adding mentally, _'And on edge, frustrated, a few other things..'_ as I bit my lower lip, twisted a dark strand of hair around my fingertip. He stared at me a few moments, he really looked at the button down shirt I was wearing and for a moment I wondered if maybe he might be wondering if it's one of his shirts, but I doubt he even realized it was gone.

Neither of us spoke for about three minutes or so and finally I side stepped him and asked quietly, "You're sleeping okay.. On that couch, I meant."

"Yeah. I'm.. It's fine." Neville said as he shuffled his feet.

I smiled and then faked a yawn then said "And now it really is off to bed for me."

I went back into my room and failed miserably again at sleep. Around 3 am I wandered into the living room and just sort of stood there a moment. I realized he'd completely kicked the blanket over him off and the apartment stays a nice and cool 55 to 60 most summer nights. I bent and pulled it up on him again and turned, walked out of the living room.

Finally, I succeeded in sleep and I don't think I woke up until 7 am when he pounded on my bedroom door to tell me that my alarm was going off, barely awake himself.

We have a little less than 2 weeks to get used to each other. And if last night is any indication, it's going to be a long and slow process..

But there's this little glimmer of hope inside me for some reason. Things feel more stable and better than they have in a long time. This arrangement feels right.

I just wish I knew what he felt.


	3. Tension Eases

**Thanks again for the second review I've gotten. It thrills me to read the reviews and guest, I totally agree with you, shy and sweet Neville = to die for! So I sort of put some shy / sweet / awkwardness in here for you, I hope you like it! I'm sorry if this sort of moves slowly or is slightly OOC at times. I'm sort of trying to merge the shy and sweet Neville with the brave and confident young man that I feel he became by Deathly Hallow's end. Hopefully, it's not making anyone angry or less likely to read it.**

* * *

THREE

~ NEVILLE ~

I've been here about two days now and things are.. Well, they're awkward. We both know there's a lot that's going unspoken, that there's this heavy sort of tension there and I find myself wondering if maybe it's because she doesn't want to be forced into marrying me. I mean we've talked, it's not like we've been avoiding one another or walking round on eggshells or something in the two days I've been here.

There's just tension.

This much was evident when I walked into the bathroom just as she'd stepped out of the shower, towel almost dwarfing her. She shrieked and I shielded my eyes awkwardly as my face heated and I blushed. A few seconds later, she mused aloud, "We're umm.. We'll have to get used to this at some point."

I nodded but kept my back turned. There's an order to this entire crazy thing and the way I see it, even if we're being forced into this situation.. It doesn't mean I'm going to just jump right in over my head either. Besides.. What if she doesn't want to marry me?

I can't say I mind marrying her that much, to be honest about it.

"We are." I admitted after a few moments, turning around thinking surely she had to have dressed already, only to find her slipping a tank top down over her head. I gulped and the damned knot was forming in my throat all over again before I could stop it.

I grabbed a tooth brush and our hands brushed because she grabbed for her neon pink one at the same time. She smiled a moment, stared at me as if she were going to say something, this amused sort of smirk on her face.

"What?" I asked through a mouth full of toothpaste.

"Nothing. I was just thinking.." she said as she fell silent, started to brush her own teeth. I kicked myself mentally, it might have sounded like I was edgy, I know I'd been snapping a little more than I usually do since my arrival here, it's just this situation.

I'll be mad in more ways than one by the end of it I think.

"I'm sorry.. I'm just tense."

"Me too. And it's okay." Celeste admitted quietly as she stopped brushing her teeth to look up at me again, she looked like she wanted to say something again but she was either afraid to say it or didn't want to. She shook her head and I asked quietly, "Are you okay?"

"I just.. Nevermind. Let's get through the next few days, okay? At least we won't have to stay here too long, things went smoother than I thought they'd go. You won't miss the first few days of the school year."

It dawned on me then.. With all this dancing around everything we've been doing, we haven't decided yet how this is going to work.. I mean the entire purpose of this stupid and pointless Decree is to procreate, yes?

Explain how I'm supposed to do that if I hardly leave the castle grounds?

She snickered and my head shot up and I asked with a raised brow, "What's funny?"

"You, you're wound so tight.." Celeste answered, spitting toothpaste into the sink, rinsing it down and then turning to just sort of stand there and watch me.

One of us is going to have to bring up some of these issues we need to figure out soon or we'll never figure anything out.

It seems like we're both reluctant. I know why I am, I just wish I knew why she was.

She turned and walked out of the bathroom and I heard the television come on in the living room. When I walked out, she was sitting on the couch, bare legs folded as she sat watching some movie on tv. I chuckled quietly when I saw her mouthing the actor's next line and I was torn between watching her and watching the movie.

I'd started to get into the movie when she turned the set off. I felt her gaze and I looked over at her, found her watching me, the amused look on her face.

"We really need to talk about something. I mean we've both avoided it." she said finally.

I took a few deep breaths.

"Where the hell are we going to live?" she asked, curiousity gleaming in her light brown eyes as she bit her lower lip and appeared to be in deep thought herself.

I felt myself relaxing a little. She hadn't asked about that night in the towers.

Should I ask her about it?

Or wait?

 _Best to wait, Neville. You two aren't even really used to each other yet.. you have to get used to each other before you go bringing up a loaded subject._ I thought to myself as I raked my hand over my hair then said quietly, "I suppose we could see if we could get a flat or something in Hogsmeade so it's not so far away."

"That works for me." Celeste answered. She scooted a little closer I couldn't help but notice because her long dark hair brushed against my forearm. "Do I really make you that nervous? I mean despite everything, Neville.. We could at least try and be friends.. Right?"

I looked at her as her lips curved into a pout that sort of made the knot form in my throat again. She's blushing and fidgeting, I can tell that yes, I make her that nervous too. My heart sped up a little.. Maybe?

I didn't dare hope that she felt something too. I probably ruined all that the night in the towers.

"We can, I don't see what it would hurt." I answered, turning slightly so I could face her while we talked. "You're right. This doesn't have to be entirely awkward."

"Personally, Neville, I was actually pleasantly surprised when I found out we were supposed to marry. If it'd been someone like that prat Malfoy or Goyle." Celeste grimaced visibly and I laughed a moment. Her hair fell into her right eye and I leaned in a little, sort of awkwardly brushed it out of her eye. "Your hair.."

"Yes, I know. Sometimes it annoys me to the point that I almost want to shave my entire head."

I gaped at her and shook my head. "It looks good like this." I blurted, mentally kicking myself. _Like it's not obvious that I've hardly no experience with a female_ , I thought to myself bitterly.

Celeste blushed a little, it was cute. Her teeth grazed her lower lip, she raked her hand through her hair and then stammered "I... Thanks." as she stood and held out her hand. "C'mon.. We're going to get food. You have to eat at this place I always go to before we leave here and go back there.. Please?"

I raised my brow and she said with a pout, "It's not so bad, I promise. We're trying not to make this awkward, remember?"

"Yes but.."

"Neville, damn it. It's food. What could go wrong if we're just going to get something to eat?" she asked, this playful grin on her face as she went down the hallway and into her room, probably to change clothes or something.

I sat there on the couch I'd been sleeping on wondering just how well this was going to go.. We're trying not to make things awkward. I'd rather be friends with her if I can't have her the way I really want, if I messed that one up long ago.

She came out of the bedroom down the hall and jingled her car keys. I raised a brow and she said with a smile, "My driving isn't that bad."

"I just remember how you flew during our flying lessons."

"And? I wasn't dangling from my broom either, was I?" Celeste teased playfully, her hand went to her mouth and she apologized quickly. I guess I looked upset or angry when she said it, truthfully, I wasn't.

"Yes, well.. Which of us went to the infirmary before the end of flying lessons and to my knowledge hasn't gotten back on a broom since?" I deadpanned, giving her a slight grin to show her I wasn't upset or angry.

"I actually haven't. And I'm not fond of planes either." Celeste admitted, shrugging. I followed her down to the parking garage in her building and gaped at her car, it's fire engine red and small. I looked at her and then down at myself.

"The seats recline, Neville."

"Recline?"

"They move back."

"It's a magical car?"

She laughed a second and shook her head then opened the passenger door and bent slightly, feeling along under the seat. I saw her find a button and the seat moved back a little. She smirked up at me and then said "Not magic. Things in this world sadly.. They take ten times as long. But I've found that I sort of enjoyed not just whipping out my wand or saying a little word or something. Just gives me something to do to occupy my mind?"

"Two jobs and college doesn't?"

Celeste shrugged and I got into the passenger side, she got into the driver seat. The car took off, it sort of felt like a rocket. Secretly, I won't tell her this though, she's not much better with the car than she was with the broom when we were both Hogwarts students.

We rode silently, the muggle stereo playing in the background. I watched things go past in literal brightly colored blurs, I did my level best to not look over and see if one of the many gauges on her dashboard told the speed. I probably didn't want to know how fast she was going currently.

We came to a stop just outside of the city, this little diner. She smiled at me and then said quietly, "And we're here now... The people that own this place.. They kind of helped me out when I first came to Nevada."

I nodded and wondered what she meant by that. Were they wizards too?

"There are wizards and witches here, Neville.. There's just no need to keep things secret. Nobody here seems to really believe that the magic exists. Marv and Alba are wizarding world people.. They left during the first war I believe."

I nodded and walked in behind her. There was a big crowd in the small space, as we were going in, another group was coming out, talking and laughing loudly, and I found myself edging closer to her, the flat of my hand rested across her lower back so we didn't get seperated.

She looked up at me, her teeth grazed her lower lip again and I found myself focusing on her lips, remembering the night in the tower. I honestly think that if she hadn't gotten mad at me for accusing her of playing a prank she might have been about to kiss me.

Oddly enough, I sort of find myself wondering now what that might have been like, to kiss her.

We sat down at a booth closer to the back and an elderly woman who looked around the same age as my grandmum made her way over, smiled at Celeste. The two promptly broke into conversation in another language. The elderly man spoke up from behind them, "Italian. Celeste's grandmum taught her when she was smaller."

"You knew her family?"

"Just her grandmum.. Is it true? The second war is over.. And now the new Ministry is passing that stupid Marriage Decree again?"

I nodded.

He chuckled and then said with a smirk, "She was happy it was you. Never actually said why, just said she wasn't dreading it like she would have."

I eyed Celeste who was talking to the other woman, still in Italian, naturally, and I managed a smile. Okay, so maybe she didn't entirely hate me for what happened that night in the tower.. But that didn't mean this would turn into us falling in love either.. I reminded myself of that.

Finally we ordered our food and as we waited on it, we talked.. Or she talked, telling me about the places she went and things she did and tried while living on the run. I told her about the uprising, how we all had to hide out in the lower level of the school when things got their worst. About the attacks and everything else that happened.

She leaned in, her chin propped on her hand as she looked up at me, sort of gaping.

"So you killed Nangini.. I mean Lavendar said you were the one to do it.. But it's Lavendar who was telling me, I take everything she says with a grain of salt. Always have. You're a hero." Celeste said as she smiled at me a little, this soft sort of look in her eyes.

I shrugged and shook my head, told her that Harry was the real hero. He'd done the more important thing. All I did was help him.

"What you did was just as important, Neville.. Whether you realize it or not." Celeste said quietly as she held out a covered cup with a straw in it.

"Try it."

"What is it?"

"Chocolate milkshake." she answered as she took a slow sip of her own, groaning as she said aloud, "I'll miss these."

"Can't we make them?"

"We could.. That's a good idea." Celeste admitted, smiling at me for a few moments. I took a sip of the milkshake in my hands and groaned. It was ice cream, not a s thick as ice cream normally is and much richer.

She wiped off her lip after I laughed at her being so messy. I continued to laugh and said "You have ketchup on your nose.."

"Yeah, well.. If it's good food you always wind up wearing it. They didn't have their usual rack of ribs tonight. I love those." she admitted while eating her food, smiling.

I ate my food quietly, thoughtfully, watching her.

Maybe we can make this work.. And things are maybe starting to feel a lot less tense between us..


	4. Electricity

**Thanks again for the second review AND for the follow that I've gotten. It thrills me to read the reviews and guest, I totally agree with you, shy and sweet Neville = to die for! So I sort of put some shy / sweet / awkwardness in here for you, I hope you like it! Okay, so there is definite flirting/awkwardness/fluff here. I hope you guys like that!**

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FOUR

(CELESTE)

I could feel this intent gaze on me and I looked up and around. My eyes found Neville, he stood in the open doorway of the dance studio, arms crossed, watching me dance to the music playing from a stereo in the corner. There was this sort of glow in his eyes and as our eyes locked on each other, I felt my throat sort of shrinking, I literally couldn't breathe for a few minutes.

He stopped the stereo and the music fell silent. I walked towards him and then asked casually, "Did you get bored up at the apartment?"

"Yeah.. I remembered you saying that there was a gym and the dance studio on the bottom floor of this place so I thought maybe you'd be in here. You're umm.. You're good." Neville managed, it sounded as if he were flustered or something. I shook my head and then said quietly, "Not that good. If I were as good as I wanted to be I'd have made it into that dance troupe when I auditioned a year or two ago after I first came out here." as I sort of stared up at him a few moments.

My heart was hammering away like mad against my rib cage, I wondered for a moment how he didn't hear it as close as we were standing. I raised to tiptoe and straightened the tie he wore then asked quietly, "Well? I know you had to go back earlier.. For that meeting about your own job.. Are you taking over as the professor or is Ms. Sprout coming back another term?"

He grinned broadly, shrugging as he managed to mumble, "As soon as the term starts I'll be taking over. It'll seem strange, ya know.. I'd gotten used to working with Pomona, err, Professor Sprout." and I hugged him on a whim. I've known him since our days as students in Hogwarts, I know how much he really and truly loves Herbology, I know that for him this has to be a huge deal.

I was happy for him.

However, I was not expecting the way this slow and almost electric tingle made it's way through my veins when I hugged him just then. Nor was I expecting him to bend slightly, picking me up so that I wasn't having to stand on tiptoe as he hugged me back.

I wasn't sure which shocked me more.. The way it felt so intimate and at the same time sweet.. Or the fact that Neville hugged me back. Normally, he's much more shy and reserved.

The hug broke too soon for me and I looked up at him, smiled. "I think I found us a place.. I mean it's not a flat above one of the pubs.. It's actually a little better? Lavendar knew about it, she told me."

He started to say something and I said quietly, "I know, I know.. But I have money, okay? And it's just sitting there. If I want this, I'm going to do it. It has space for a garden." as I waited, tapping my bare foot lightly against the pale hardwood of the dance studio floor.

"And it's livable.. Right?" he asked, I noticed that he seemed to be a little shocked about something himself, or in some sort of deep thought. I nodded and then said " I actually got her to talk to the woman who owned it and wants to sell.."

"You're really serious about this, aren't you?" Neville asked, his eyes roamed a little I notice as he shifted his feet, sort of giving me this wary smile.

"We did say that this didn't have to be awkward. And we do have to get married or go to prison. And if I have to go back there, Neville.. I'm going back there on my own terms. So yes.. I'm serious about this." I answered, omitting of course things I really wanted to say, things that he probably could have used hearing such as _'When life gives you what you really want for once as opposed to a lot of stress and pain Neville then yes.. You tend to want to make things with the one thing you want go as smoothly as possible.'_ or _'Why wouldn't I be, I'm finally getting a chance to live my dream.. To some degree, of course.. I mean when I fantasized back then I was a world renowned prima ballerina and you were my rugged and handsome and strong Auror.'_ but I kept quiet, I was afraid that maybe if I said the things, things might go back to the awkwardness of everything as it had been initially, around the start of last week.

I also didn't say the things I wanted because I've always been more of an actions kind of girl. My actions have more often than not spoken for me. I should have said them out loud, but I didn't realize that he was still so unsure about pretty much everything, that he was silently freaking out about all of this.

"Are you hungry? I'm starved." I muttered abruptly when once again our eyes locked on each other and that electric tingling sort of started to run through my veins. I coughed to distract myself and he smiled a little, nodded.

"I'll make us spaghetti."

"Spaghetti?"

"With actual handcooked marinara. You haven't eaten spaghetti, Neville, until you've eaten spaghetti without the canned sauce." I trailed off, palming my forehead when I realized that he might not have ever eaten spaghetti to begin with.

NEVILLE

Some sort of music, another Muggle band I'd reckon, turned on as soon as she'd gotten into the apartment. I thought about everything that's remained unsaid and what she did say down in the gym and dance studio on the lower level of this place when I snuck down to watch her, curious about her dancing.

She's even better at it than she was when we were both still students at Hogwarts. She moves and her body's graceful, fluid, limber. I coughed a little as she turned around and again, we found ourselves body to body in the small kitchen. She laughed a little. I managed a laugh but internally.. I was thinking about the unexpected hug when I told her that I'll be the acting Herbology professor when school starts up again at Hogwarts.

It felt right. She looked almost as happy for me as I was to have gotten the position.

And of course, my mind went right back to the proactive thing she'd done, finding a place we could live in if we wanted.. She hasn't acted angry about having been paired with me a single time in all this, it's really starting to make me wonder if maybe for once Lavendar wasn't exaggerating.. If maybe Celeste was telling me her true feelings the night I brushed her off and stormed out of the towers.

"Can you reach that pot?" Celeste asked me, laughing a little as she pointed over her head to the highest shelf in the cupboard above the counters in her kitchen. I snickered a moment and asked finally, "If you're barely 5'0 foot tall, woman, why in Merlin would you put the pot you use most above your head?"

"See, well.. I really didn't use the kitchen often before.." Celeste admitted, shrugging. I gaped at her a moment and sort of felt bad, like my showing up forced her to actually have to cook when she was used to getting something to eat before she came home.

"Oh."

"No, Neville.. It's not a bad thing.. I just never had the time before.. Since we're leaving soon and it'll take some time for me to find things to do there.. I want to make my own food. It's nothing to do with you being here and I didn't mean it in a bad way." Celeste quickly blurted as I reached up and grabbed the pot, held it out to her, smiled a little as I did so. "You don't have to do that.. I don't automatically assume that everything you say is a bad thing anymore. I mean I used to.. I've changed a lot." I said as I leaned against the counter, watching her as she worked on making some kind of tangy smelling sauce with tomatoes and a few other things.

"I know it's just.." she trailed off, going quiet on me again. She swore sharply and her index finger went to her mouth. I saw the sliver of blood drip down her finger and I took her hand, looked at it, then at the knife and asked quietly, "You're sure you don't want to just use magic?"

"I like doing things the hard way." Celeste said as she looked at her finger, which I still held in my hand and then pouted for a second. I couldn't help but think about that pout.. How it and several other things were going to drive me positively insane by the end of all this.

"Yes, but.." I started, only to have her giving me a firm look. I waved my hands and then took the knife and suggested, "Maybe if you use the knife to crush it instead of slicing. Like that one thing we had to work with in Potions?" as I showed her and looked up at her. I found her watching me intently. Her tongue trailed slowly over her lower lip and I coughed a little, handed the knife back abruptly.

Was I really just attempting to flirt with her then?

My cheeks burned hot when I realized that yes, I had been attempting to flirt with her just then.

"I think I remember." she said quietly as she took the knife from me carefully. Her hand remained closed around mine for a moment and she added as an afterthought, "Maybe it won't be like Finnigan all over again, huh? I don't think the landlord would look to kindly to having to clean burnt pasta and sauce off the walls and c eiling."

We shared a laugh and she started trying to crush the garlic clove. She swore when she missed it the first few times.

I chuckled and was about to point out what she was doing wrong but she gave me that sort of smoldering look and I fell silent.

For a few moments, we stared at each other intently. My heart was beating against my chest like a bird beating it's wings and my stomach sort of flopped and flipped nervously. The air was so thick that I couldn't breathe and I caught myself wondering if she felt the tension too. It wasn't the same tension as it had been when I arrived here last week.

This was different.. Almost an electric sort of tension. Charged somehow.

She turned the stove on and turned to face me, we were once again migrating closer. She had that look in her eyes again like she wanted to ask me something or tell me something but again she shook her head and kept quiet.

"It smells good." I muttered quietly after the aroma of the sauce filled the air.

She smiled brightly and then said "My grandmum.. She made everything this way.. Could have used magic, chose not to. Wouldn't let my mum use magic to cheat on the chores either. My mum used to get so pissed. I mean I vaguely remember her now, but.. I remember those things.. and my grandmum's cottage in Sicily.." as she bit her lower lip and fell silent.

After a few moments, she spoke up and said quietly, " Sorry.." as she raised to tiptoe and again, I thought she'd kiss me. I was actually preparing myself for it mentally. Instead, she hesitated and straightened the collar on my blazer then sort of just stared at me for a few moments.

Which is strange because she's never been the shy one. I had it pointed out to me shortly after finding out that Celeste was who I was going to be forced to marry that I seemed to be the only boy at Hogwarts that made her at least slightly less unsure of herself, slightly more shy.

It baffled me and it still baffles me as to why but both Lavvie and Seamus as well as Dean and even Ginny claim that they noticed it too when we were all in school together. I used her statement from earlier down in the dance studio against her and asked quietly, "Do I really make you that nervous?"

"I... It's just.." she stammered a few moments before grumbling at herself and falling silent, stirring the sauce that boiled slowly on the stovetop.

"This doesn't have to be awkward." I reminded her as I reached into the refridgerator and dug out a bottle of water and took a sip, added a few seconds later, "We don't have to pretend to be whatever it is we think the other wants. The situation is what it is, Celeste. And personally, I'd rather not have you feeling awkward and nervous all the time."

She stopped stirring and turned to look at me a few moments, biting her lower lip as if she were thinking. "I know, Neville.. I just.. You've always sort of made me this wreck, okay?" she admitted before turning away, going back to preparing the spaghetti.

I stood there a few moments pondering over what she'd just admitted.

"At least we can get along. And we can be friendly." she finally added. I nodded and reaching around her, I picked up a spoon, dipped it into the sauce. She muttered something in Italian I think as she looked up at me and swatted my hand gently.

I tasted the sauce and said through the mouth full, "This is really good."

"It is?"

"It is."

"And you're right. At least we can get along and be friendly. There are quite a few others who didn't really get that lucky." I admitted, chuckling when I remembered other friends of mine that were matched and how it hadn't been quite so easy for them.

I mean yes, it was sort of tense between Celeste and I.. And we had the awkwardness.. There were things we just wouldn't talk about or say to each other and we both seemed reluctant to even attempt to try for more, which yes, I did want.. But at least we didn't hate the sight of each other, right?


	5. Revelation

**Thanks again for the second review AND for the two follows that I've gotten. It thrills me to read the reviews! They make me so happy! Anyway, this chapter is sort of a deeper look into things I suppose. It's vague, but it's implied. I'm trying really, really hard not to rush right into things and to make it seem a little realistic, hopefully I'm pulling it off? Anyway, yeah.. this chapter's sort of awkward and a little angsty.. But a move will be made soonish, I swear to God. I don't wanna bore you guys actually reading this to death.**

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FIVE

(Neville)

I'd had to go back earlier to take care of some things that needed to be done before the year started at Hogwarts, so I figured I'd meet up with Seamus and Dean and a few other former classmates while I was in Hogsmeade. I walked into the Hogs Head and sat down on the stool and Seamus asked me with curious eyes, "Well?"

"It's going." I said mildly, signalling the bartender for a shot of Firewhiskey, drinking it. I could feel Seamus and Dean eying me, waiting on details, and Lavendar, who'd come with Seamus, they're hardly ever apart, spoke up and said in a bossy tone, "What the ruddy... What do you mean it's going, Longbottom? When you get a chance to fix something like this, you fix it."

"Wot te pretty lass es saying, Longbottom, is at least snog 'er." Seamus inserted, giving Lavendar a playful look as he did so. I shook my head and then said "Oh no.. No.. Are you both mad?"

"No, but you are.. Mad for her." Dean joked. I glared at him and he sipped the butterbeer in front of him, said casually, "You always have been, mate. So do something about it already."

"Such as?"

"Maybe bring up why you went off on her that night in the towers. Maybe tell her how you feel and tell her you thought she was playing a cruel prank.. Since both of you seem to like dancing around the subject, apparently." Dean's girlfriend spoke up.

She's a friend of Celeste's, apparently they've all gotten into contact with each other again since she realized she'd be moving back here after all, that this life wasn't completely behind her and forgotten. I mulled it over a few moments and then asked in curiousity, "Did she say something?"

"She didn't have to, Longbottom. Are all you lot bloody dense as he is?" Lavendar asked, giving me a teasing and friendly smirk. But it was Dean's girlfriend Amaya that gave me something that gave me vital insight into the inner workings of Celeste..

She held out a battered and old looking pink and black notebook, said in a bored tone, "She accidentally threw it into my trunk at the end of our last year. Not really sure why I kept it.. But anything she felt, Longbottom.. It went into the book." as she and Lavendar got up and went to the bathroom.

I stared at the notebook. I'd seen her writing in it quite a bit but every single time I dared to try and peek inside, she slammed it shut and mumbled something under her breath. I'm assuming that she had some sort of safeword, something like the Marauders Map that the twins gave Harry when we were in school.

I opened the book and the pages were blank. I glared at the book, shut it again and then said "It's violating her privacy anyway."

Lavendar came back and took the book, muttered something and with a quick wave of her wand, the words began to appear on the books pages. She held the book out to me, a knowing smile on her face as she informed me, "All you had to do you silly git was say your own name." before going back to the stool next to Seamus.

I started to read, entry after entry.. I realized there's a lot more to Celeste than I thought. There are things she really didn't ever tell anyone. The very last entry of the journal was the most telling.. It was from the night in the towers, there were entries for before and after..

And I realized just why she was telling me everything she felt for me that night.

She knew she was going to have to go into hiding, she was about to lose her father and her siblings, possibly to never see them again. Apparently, her father's father decided to use the tensions that were rising to teach his son a lesson about his place in the grand scheme of things, how marrying and procreating with a Muggle was not what he was raised to believe in, or who he was supposed to have become.

And Celeste knew that if they had to go their seperate ways to keep from almost certain death, she might not ever see me again either.

Seamus nudged me and I held up a finger, continued to read..

The entry from just before we actually met at the towers was full of how nervous she was, how she couldn't wait to just get it all out in the open, how she planned to tell me first and then she planned to kiss me. Her first ever **real** kiss.

And she was going to give it to me, of all people.

I stopped reading after that entry and ordered two more shots of Firewhiskey which made Seamus raise a brow and Dean snicker.

Then I started to read again, my eyes darted over the page, noted the smudged and smeared ink that looked as if she'd written it while crying. I tried not to, but I pictured her doing that very thing. She pretty much gave a detailed recount of how I'd told her she couldn't be serious, that she was just playing a joke, that I knew she didn't really feel all those things for me.. If she had, I'd thrown out at her, why date all the other boys she'd dated? Why act the way she acted at times?

I got an explanation for that too. Apparently, every single time she tried to flirt with me or send me signals that she only really wanted me, I'd either blown them off or not noticed. And she figured that if I thought she wasn't good enough for me, she'd just stop trying and hoping.

Mentally, I kicked myself as I sucked in a few breaths and shut the book firmly after muttering my name so that the words would vanish and nobody would know I read it but me.. And of course, our friends.

I gulped down another shot and grimaced, wiping my mouth off.

"Well?" Seamus asked. I shrugged. I didn't know what I was going to do with all this new insight, I didn't know what I'd say now, how I'd act as if I knew nothing like I'd been before because I didn't know anything then.

I couldn't go back and forget what I just read. I didn't really want to, either.

"Well what, Finnigan?"

"Ye are goin ta do sometin about et, roight?" Seamus asked, eying me. I stammered a few moments, fidgeted.

What **could** I do?

I've never been comfortable making the first move or taking the lead in anything. And just by reading a word for word recount of the last night I saw her, in the towers at Hogwarts, well.. I knew that if anyone were going to, it might just have to be me.. Because she'd probably given up by now..

 _'Or gotten over it all, you're not Merlin's gift to women, Neville. She might not even feel those things anymore.'_ I thought to myself as I stood and then said quietly, "I'm going to go back. I'll see you all in a few days."

"Do something, damn it, Longbottom!"

"If you don't, Longbottom, we're locking the both of you into a closet. And neither of you will come out until someone does something. This whole ridiculous thing has gone on for entirely too long."

I waved off Lavendar and Amaya, aparated back to Celeste's apartment. She was sleeping when I got there, wearing one of my white button downs, tossing and turning, muttering things under her breath, wincing in her sleep. I started to wake her several times, instead, I sat in the darkness of the apartment, the words from her journal repeating in my mind almost as if she were saying them.

I know now why she was the way she was then, why she is the way she is now. I know and I'm still wary of making the first move. What if she's over it and doesn't want me in that way anymore? What if she's really just wanting to be my friend now?

(Celeste)

We both sort of did our own thing today, I'm betting that while Neville's in Hogsmeade Village doing what he had to go and do, he'll spend the rest of the day with Seamus and Dean and maybe a few others he was friends with during school.. So I'd taken the time to finish all my packing, and then I'd sent all my things ahead to the place we'd be living together after we went back at the end of the week.

Then I'd went to the dance studio.. I thought honestly that if I danced out all this frustration, I'd feel better. All I feel right now is exhausted. I'd come back from the dance studio about two hours before Neville got in, changed into one of the button downs he'd been wearing and after turning on the television and stopping it on one of my all time favorite movies, Pretty Woman, I'd fallen asleep sprawled across the couch.

When I woke up, it was just starting to get dark, the sunset was on display through my open curtains. _That's another thing I'll miss about Nevada for a while_ I thought to myself as I sat up, yawning, my hair a mess.

I didn't even realize that Neville had come home until I went to slide off of the couch, intending on slipping his button down back into the neatly folded stack of his clothing that sat in the bathroom on a shelf so he wouldn't notice it was missing or something.. I'd been planning on doing that but instead, he grabbed hold of me before I could go down the hallway to the bathroom.

"You're here.. Damn it, I was going to cook. I must have fallen asleep. I think I put myself through a wringer earlier." I said casually, looking at Neville. His eyes sort of flashed this deeper yet brighter green a moment, and for a few minutes, he didn't speak, he just looked up at me.

"This entire time, Celeste, you haven't seemed angry about being matched to me, not even a little." he asked finally. I nodded, brow raised.. We'd been through this before to some degree.. Was he about to tell me that he didn't want to be matched to me? That the purpose of his going back today was to try and appeal the whole thing with the Ministry? My stomach sort of churned nervously. Finally, when my tongue came loose from the roof of my mouth and I could speak I answered quietly, "Because, Neville.. It could've been loads worse. And we were sort of friends until.." my voice fell away. I didn't want to bring up the night in the towers, the way I obviously overstepped my boundaries and made him feel really, really uncomfortable.

I tried my best not to even think about it.. And until we were matched and this Marriage Decree was passed, it was working out pretty brilliantly for me.

"Until we fought." he finished, looking up at me, that look in his eyes again. I raised a brow and shrugged, tried as best as I could to pretend that I forgot what he was talking about. I bit my lower lip and then said quietly, "It was sort of my fault.. If I hadn't been the way I was, Neville, maybe you'd have actually believed me. But it doesn't matter now, okay? Let's just not take this conversation any further. I'd really rather not relive it. Especially not when things are finally okay again. It happened a long time ago, it's water under the bridge now, we've both obviously moved past it."

 _'Liar. You never got past it. You just sort of shoved it down, went about all of the other things that fell to you to do to keep yourself safe. You didn't really have time to be upset, to really cry about it or dwell on it. Which is a good thing, you realize now that doing that would have been melodramatic.'_ my mind argued me as soon as I'd spoken the words I said to Neville aloud. I hadn't moved past it. I'd just buried it. I bury everything that hurts or bothers me, I'd rather not deal with them.

"Finally okay again?" he asked, looking at me, his brow was raised now.

"The war's over, we both got out alive and so forth." I answered lamely. That hadn't been my whole answer, but I was determined **not** to open Pandora's box again, have my heart crushed again. I was going to be able to go through this arranged marriage and to it's more than likely end with my dignity intact, damn it.

I was an adult. And if there was one thing I'd learned in more recent years?

Romantic movies and novels, all of that.. They were all wrong, misguided. True love does not conquer all. It only makes people do and say stupid things, it only takes and breaks and causes pain and loss, tormenting and driving someone crazy when it's over and you didn't see it coming.

My father lost my mum when I was 3. I think that's pretty much when the whole notion of forever went out the window with me. It made me the way I was, it drove my father to drinking and depression for a while. And then he started dating again.. Anything with tits and an ass, anything in a skirt.

But nothing ever helped him ease the pain. It helped him cope, he still did his best by me and my siblings, of course, he was an amazing father, but the fact remained.. We saw his pain.. It affected me and my siblings in very different and very profound ways.

Neville cleared his throat, I realized that I'd been standing there just sort of zoned out for a few minutes now, thinking about why I did the things I did while in Hogwarts... Why I still keep a large part of myself closed off even now and that most likely will not ever change. I looked down at him and said quietly, "What?"

"I wanted to say I'm sorry.. For the fight. For not at least listening then." Neville admitted, turning his gaze back to his hands, looking as if he were in deep thought.

I nodded and then said quietly, "It's fine. I wasn't angry with you. It didn't hurt. I don't actually blame you for thinking what you did, I mean I did get around." as I shuffled my bare feet against the hardwood floor of my apartment.

He realized then, of all times, that I was wearing one of his shirts. And when he commented on it, I shrugged and said casually, "I just grabbed a shirt. This one was in the clean clothes I hadn't sorted and packed or put away yet.. If you want it back.." leaving the sentence unfinished just to get a reaction.. He blushed and I fluffed his hair then said "In all seriousness.. I'm going to find my pajamas, so as soon as I change I'll put it back with your things."

After he let go of my wrist, I walked down the hallway and into the bathroom. Once I was in the bathroom, I gripped the counter and wondered a few minutes why now he'd bring up that night and apologize for it.

I remembered how fond Seamus and Dean were of Firewhiskey, quickly reassured myself that was the **only** reason he'd done it, maybe he'd surpassed his usual 2 shot limit when he was with his friends at the pub.

No other reason than that. It had **nothing** to do with me. Or his maybe feeling anything for me, then or now. I wasn't that special. I've never been that special.. I never will be that special.

 _And if this arrangement is going to work_ , I reminded myself in a whisper as I splashed cold water onto my face to further wake myself up, _I cannot let myself think for even a second that we'll ever be more than friends._ Because the second I start thinking that maybe we can make this last despite the way we came to be together, forced by the new Ministry rules.. That's when it will all fall apart for me.

And things have already fallen apart two times before in my life. I'm not really wanting it to happen a third time. There was losing my mum when I was younger.. Then there was the war, how it ripped my family apart, how I found out later that I'd lost every single person I really did love. My family was gone.

It's one of the biggest reasons I was sort of going to just turn my back on that life until this whole Marriage Decree came into play.

I'm not going to let myself get too comfortable or too used to the idea of being married to Neville.. because if I do.. I'm terrified that if I do, if I let go and I let myself fall.. I'll lose him too somehow.


	6. Home

**Thanks again for the second review AND for the three follows that I've gotten. It thrills me to read the reviews! They make me so happy! This chapter is Celeste looking at the cottage she bought, it's sort of another deeper look into her and why she is the way she is. It's mostly filler but a move will be made soonish, I swear to God. I don't wanna bore you guys actually reading this to death.**

* * *

(CELESTE)

I honestly had mixed feelings about buying the little house I had with some of the inheritance I had left, sight unseen. I think though, that when I did it, purely on a whim, I just sort of knew that I was going to have to have a lot of things to do, occupy my time and what have you so that I wouldn't be alone in my own head so much.

Maybe I also did it so that I could fool myself a little, make it feel a little realistic. I mean we're slowly becoming friends again which is great, don't get me wrong, but.. I want more. But given what happened last time I tried?

I'll stick with what I can actually have.

I'd decided when I woke up that morning, since Neville was going to the castle today, to get the greenhouses ready, I'd go to the little cottage, see just how big a mistake I might have made. I stepped through the fireplace and into this small but cozy off white painted living room, my eyes darted around.. It wasn't so bad, this room wasn't at least. I hadn't seen the rest of the house yet, of course.

I think the floors and the beams in the high ceilings were what made me gasp. Seeing it as opposed to the picture I'd sort of built up of this little place mentally was literally night and day, there was a world of difference.

The price, you see.. The woman selling was practically giving the house away.. And with it's proximity to Hogsmeade and Hogwarts.. Anyone who has a child who attends Hogwarts knows how hard it is to find a place nearby.. Because if you don't, travel is expensive.. And then if you do, the house itself can sometimes cost nothing if not a small fortune.

I'd been just about to apparate to Lavendar and Seamus' little house nearby, but the door opened and Lavendar and Amaya, this girl Dean Thomas is seeing stepped in through the white painted French doors that lead in from the front yard.

"Well?" Lavendar asked.

"It's.. I definitely did not expect it to be in really good shape."

"The woman who sold it.. Her husband died recently, she said there are too many memories here. That maybe it was time for a new couple to take it. I told her about you and Neville.." Lavendar said as her teeth grazed her lower lip and she shuffled her feet.

I groaned inwardly.. Lavendar Brown is my best friend and I love her to pieces but.. Sometimes she has this tendency, you see, she speaks BEFORE she thinks as opposed to thinking and then speaking. So knowing her like I do, there's no telling what Lavendar told the woman.

"Have you seen the kitchen?"

We stepped down into the next room, the kitchen had a drop down step, it was at the rear of the house, nothing but grass and one or two trees.. Lots of garden space, I mused to myself as I smiled.. Maybe that would make Neville considerably less concerned that this entire idea had been a bad one, me ge tting this place.

The kitchen was small and like the living room, it had off white walls, hardwood flooring and high vaulted ceilings with wooden plank beams that ran across. There was this little window with a window seat, I stared at it a moment.

"And the stove and all this other stuff.. She's just going to leave it? I mean all this stuff is original, vintage.. The woman could have sold this place for a fortune, Lavendar." I insisted, feeling bad, feeling as if I'd perhaps given considerably less than the house itself was actually worth.

"I know but.. She seemed to want you two to have it."

"Yeah, well.. It'll be the two of us for a few years and then.." I trailed off. I'm still going by the mindset that Neville will most likely want to walk away as fast as he can by the end of all this. My life, it's just.. I've never had anything actually go the way I wanted it to go..

For a while there, in Nevada.. My secondary life plan was coming along smoothly.. I was this close to having all the things I wanted (or made myself believe I wanted.. Deep down, even then, I think I knew that what I really wanted was probably never going to be what I got so I just sort of settled) and then the Marriage Decree happened.

I had to turn down a spot in this exclusive dance company. Nobody knows that though. I've told noone, not even Lavendar. Certainly not Neville, I don't want him to feel bad or anything. Besides, I can't be a prima ballerina or ballroom dancer, it's a childish wish to begin with.. But I was **good**. I could have been someone for once, done something.

Now I'm about to marry a man that I love who probably doesn't and won't ever return the feeling. And yes, it's arranged. And we get along better than some of the couples who've been matched by this idiotic law, yes, but I think that maybe he's not happy.. And that he just tolerates me.

That maybe he just tolerated me all along.. I mean that night in the towers at school, the things he said.. The fact that he didn't know me well enough to know it wasn't a joke..

As I said what I did aloud though, Lavendar and Amaya both grumbled, Amaya spoke up and said calmly, "And she's still insisting that this won't work out. What happened to annoyingly optimistic Celeste? I really wish she'd come back."

"Well? It hardly seems fair to trap the poor guy at the end of this." I argued as we walked down a hallway, me opening and closing doors as I peeked in each one, making little mental notes of things I'd like to do with the place while I was living here. "I mean he didn't ask to be matched to me.."

"I still don't see why you two aren't living in Cooper Manor." Lavendar said with a shrug. I looked at her and shook my head then said quietly, " I'd rather not.. I mean it's roomy, yes.. But for now, I'd rather live here.. It would just feel strange."

"How? I mean even when we were kids, Cel.. You hardly ever went home on holiday.. You were either with me or with Padma and Parvati or Amaya. And the few times you went with Luna." Lavendar asked, looking at me. I shrugged but mentally I reminded myself, _'Because there was always this air of sadness after my mum died. It wasn't home anymore, it was nothing more than bricks and wood and a foundation.. Because essentially, my family wasn't a family anymore.'_ but finally answered, "It got partially destroyed during one of the battles.. Besides, my grandfather.. I'm pretty sure he put some sort of hex on the place just to spite my father." as I grimaced.

We stepped into a bedroom at the end of a hallway, and I looked around, the windows bought in natural light, it complimented the off white walls, the dark hardwood floors and ceiling beams and the view from those windows gave an excellent look out into the backyard. There were French doors leading out into the yard.

"It's perfect.. Maybe painting here and there.. The yard is kind of bare.. I can put up a fence, plant wild roses."

Amaya snickered at this and said "If I were you, Cel.. I'd let my man do all the planting.. He is the Herbology professor.. And we've seen you indirectly cause an aloe plant to wilt and die. You had that wildflower garden, remember? What happened to it, Cel?"

I laughed a little and then said "Good point.. It'll give him things to do when he is here.. So things won't be so awkward."

"They wouldn't be, Cel, if you'd just tell the guy how you still feel already.. Or for the love of Merlin, show him." Lavendar suggested cheekily. I plugged my ears and hummed loudly, of course.. Nope, I don't think I can collect the nerve to try and make another move and only succeed in making things awkward all over again.. Things just stopped feeling as awkward as they were when he first showed up in Nevada.. I'd really rather they stay like this.

I mean at least we're friends now. Nothing's complicated..

"So.. I've seen it now.. I can safely get my stuff here." I said as I concentrated, magically transported my things here.

"That's done.. Maybe we can go get a drink now, huh girls?"

The three of us locked up the cottage and set off for town, maybe to go to the Three Broomsticks to get some drinks and talk, catch up on things.

It felt good to be back but at the same time, I felt a lot of the old pain and the stuff about the past that I kept to myself sort of lingering, haunting my thoughts.

But I'll just have to deal with everything finally and maybe it's high time I did so.


	7. Home II

**Thanks again for the second review AND for the three follows that I've gotten. It thrills me to read the reviews! They make me so happy! FIRST KISS MAYBE? Finally, right? I hope you enjoy reading so far!**

* * *

(NEVILLE)

I couldn't help but chuckle at her struggling to lead me around with this deep red silk scarf tied over my eyes. I'm a good 2 feet taller than she is almost and she insists that I will not see this surprise of hers until she takes off the makeshift blindfold. "Where are we?" I asked, only hearing her laugh.

The scarf falls away a few moments later and I looked around, gaping, my hand rakes slowly over the back of my neck. The smell of new paint hangs heavily in the air and I'm standing in the middle of this little cottage or something. The walls in the room which I'm standing in are painted this aqua color and despite everything I know to be true about the situation Celeste and I are in right now, only marrying because of the Marriage Decree.. I can't help but think that the place has this home like feel to it. I turned to look at her, I can tell by the way she's fidgeting and the way her teeth graze her lower lip that she's probably nervous as all hell right now.

We'd sort of argued a little about her just buying a cottage, sight unseen, with the money she got from her father's estate. To be fair, I only argued that maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea to go and look at it. And that we could just rent a place above the pub that another girl we went to Hogwarts with owns now.

"I wanted to plant flowers.. They just tend to die when I come into contact with them." Celeste finally said after a few long minutes of silence.. I mean I really couldn't say anything, I was just sort of wandering around the place, looking into all the rooms, trying to picture things.. And the way things just sort of came to mind without my really having to try, things that might happen here with her and I.. I think that shocked me almost as much as the realization that she did this not just for herself..

But she did it for **me** too. I mean I walk through this little cottage and I realize that there are traces of things I like throughout it, from the colors used, pictures and things on the wall.. I stopped and looked at the pictures hanging on the wall leading down the narrow hallway a few moments, she'd somehow managed to get a picture of my parents. It hung next to a picture of both of her parents. I'd only ever seen her father with her at the station and I've only really just found out that her mum died when she was three while on a visit to her grandmum, who lived in Italy at the time.

It was an auto accident in bad weather.

"How'd you get this.." I asked. She shrugged and then said quietly, " It was in your things.. I thought that if I were going to put pictures up on the wall here, I could put pictures of both our parents and families up.. That's okay... Right?"

I nodded and smiled a little, my fingertips trailed over the glass encased photo. I turned to look at her and noticed that she seemed edgy, nervous. Did she think that I didn't like the place? I hoped not because nothing could be further from the actual truth.

"W-well..."

 _'Okay, really.. You can make a move now, Neville... A girl goes to all this trouble, not just for her, but for you too.'_ I thought to myself and I took a few deep breaths, my heart hammering away like mad against my ribcage.

"I think.." I muttered, moving closer to her, my arm at her head so that she was sort of pinned between me and the wall. I had to take a few more deep breaths and I held her gaze. My eyes darted to her lips and after a few moments, I leaned in, pulled her lips against mine as my other hand tangled in her hair, pulled it out of the ribbon she had it tied up in. She gasped for a moment, but started to kiss back and I deepened the kiss as I muttered quietly, "It feels like home."

She smiled into the kiss and I bent, picking her up so that she didn't have to stand on tiptoe, I've seen her do it for an hour or two at a time when she dances, I know it has to be a little painful to do it.. Or maybe she's danced so long that she's used to it by now.' I thought to myself as the kiss deepened again and her hand dragged through the hair at the nape of my neck when her arms went around me.

From the open doorway, I heard throats clearing and looked up to find Seamus and Lavendar standing in the doorway, amused expressions on their faces as they watched us. I felt my cheeks burning, I mean I haven't really kissed many girls to begin with.. Nor have I really been one to initiate said kisses.. So I most certainly have not had friends or family walk in on me kissing a girl and while it felt a little more than awkward, all in the same, I sort of enjoyed it.

I stood her on her own feet again, though it was mostly reluctant on my part to do so, that kiss.. It sort of sparked something in me.

"I had no idea you two were coming by." I accused Seamus. All he did was grin, the smug bastard. He'll hound me now, I'm sure of it. And yes, he was right.

But I don't know what will happen beyond the kiss just now. I still have to figure out what happens next. And we still have to sort out that mess that transpired the night we met in the towers.


	8. Contrasts

**Thanks again for the third review AND for the three follows that I've gotten. It thrills me to read the reviews! They make me so happy! Second kiss, a few awkward moments.. This chapter is mostly meant to show how differently they act towards each other than they do with everyone else.. Like Neville seems to be able to take the lead in things easier and Celeste.. The poor girl turns into an awkward mess. But yes.. Things are starting to get romantic, but they'll be friends for a while longer yet. :)**

* * *

(CELESTE)

Earlier, he kissed me. Neither of us have really mentioned it since, I mean we didn't really have a chance to talk about everything, Lavvie and Seamus sort of walked in on the kiss itself to begin with and they've been here every since. We're sitting around, visiting and Lavender speaks up and says, "If we're going to talk about Hogwarts days.. Maybe you'd like to know what happened to your favorite light blue button down shirt, Neville?"

I glared a hole through Lavendar, poured myself a little more bourbon from the bottle sitting between Lavendar and I. I said through gritted teeth, "Or we could just drink more and let the men talk, Lav?"

"But Cel, it's an amusing story. One that should be told. It's the sweetest thing ever, Neville."

Neville eyed me, curious.

I wished honestly that the floor would open right up and swallow me whole right then and there. I mean just because we kissed. That doesn't magically make things on the path to happily ever after. I sipped the glass in front of me, quiet.

"Well?" Neville asked patiently. I grumbled a little, poured just a hair more bourbon into my glass and then said in a rush, "It was a truth or dare game, I wouldn't tell Lavvie who I fancied because I chose truth. So I renegged on truth and got a dare.. The dare was to steal clothing from the person I fancied."

Neville stared at me a moment as if he were rea lizing something.

"Okay.."

"And I got Seamus to sneak into your things and take your shirt and I'm sorry.. I still have it if you want it back." I said again before moving to stand up, glaring at Lavendar as I did so. Damn it, this is not something I wanted to admit.. I mean he told me how he felt about what I told him that night in the towers.

 _'But he kissed you like that just hours ago, Celeste..'_ my mind nagged. I kicked Lavendar's shin under the table when I sat back down and trying to play it cool, I asked casually, "Cards anybody?"

"Cards is a great idea." Neville muttered while staring at me as if he were in deep thought about something. I felt my skin burning hot under his intense gaze. I coughed a little, mostly to tear my eyes off of his and focus on something, anything really but the intense look he was giving me.

I sat on my hands for a few minutes, quiet, until Lavendar found a deck of cards. She dealt hands, I took my hands from beneath my legs to pick up my hand and Neville admitted, "Fred and Finnigan are the ones who are good at this game. I'm terrible."

"Celeste is pretty good. She used to win all the candy we put up for ante when we'd hang out in the towers at night." Lavendar admitted, smiling at me and mouthing covertly, "It's going to be okay, Cel."

"The hell it is, Lav." I mouthed back, keeping my eyes on my cards. It happened so quickly that at first I thought maybe it didn't at all.. He sort of pulled the chair I was sitting in closer to him and slid his free arm around it, smiling at me a little, that same thoughtful look in those intense green eyes of his. I felt my teeth grazing my lower lip and I wondered for a moment if maybe he were just being friendly..

But I couldn't help it, I leaned in against him and said with a shrug, "We can play teams.. So it'll be fair. Finnigan can help Lav and I'll help you, Neville."

Neville nodded. He kept looking at me with the thoughtful look in his eyes, I was really starting to get nervous and wondering why, I got this feeling that he wanted to say something or ask me something but he wasn't.

I mean I'm still shocked he kissed me like that, pinning me up against the hallway wall earlier. Normally, he's so much shyer than that.

Then again, normally I'm this bold and fearless kind of girl.. But one look from those eyes of his and I turn into a stuttering and stammering mess of a girl. It's always been that way.

"That's fine with me, Celeste." Neville muttered, his voice sounded deeper, almost sort of seductive, thoughtful. Whatever he was thinking about, it was really weighing his mind apparently. I turned in my chair to face him, tucking my legs beneath me, explaining the different hands and cards and their values. When I finished, he smiled and nodded.

We started the game. I poured myself a little more bourbon and sipped it. I raised a brow when Neville went to take a sip from the glass and laughed a little when he grimaced and shook his head. "I thought Firewhiskey was bad."

"It's not that bad, Neville."

"It's bitter."

"It sort of has a cinnamon taste though." I argued. He snickered a little and then said in this teasing voice, "If you say so, Celeste."

After the game ended, Lavendar and Seamus went home, it was getting late and they all had work tomorrow, Neville would be starting as Herbology professor tomorrow. I shut the door and locked it, turned to find Neville staring at me, shuffling his feet. "So.."

"So.."

"I'll take the couch if you want me to."

"Neville.." I started to say. Instead of saying something, I raised to tiptoe and this time, I kissed him, muttered against his lips, "I don't mind if you sleep in the same room as me. Nothing has to happen. No rush, no awkwardness, remember?"

"Yeah, I just figured.."

"Just come to bed, stop being impossible." I finished, deepening the kiss a little more as I leaned against him heavily, put my arms around his neck.


	9. Different Yet Not

**Thanks again for the third review AND for the four follows and one favorite I have gotten for this. It thrills me to read the reviews! They make me so happy! This chapter is kinda.. Well, it definitely took a turn for the slightly steamy.. Ironically, that's not what I intended to have happen when I sat down to work on writing it earlier? But hey, they need fluff moments/sexy moments too. Hopefully anyone reading this will like it and nobody's OOC. If not, I apologize a million times. I really am trying to keep things as IC as possible. And have things be kind of fluffy and cute while also being sexy and have a slightly slower than the norm burn to them.**

* * *

(NEVILLE)

I've gotten really used to sleeping alone. I realized this after falling asleep in the bedroom last night as opposed to the couch.

I suppose it makes sense, the two of us attempting to share a bed, I mean we're matched to be married. Still doesn't stop me from feeling sheepish or wrong about it to some degree, I mean as I've said before.. There's an order to all this, when they threw this bloody Marriage Decree out there and demanded that we all abide by it or go to prison, the order and the stages sort of just became unnecessary, but damn it, I wanted to do this properly.

Just how used to sleeping alone I had gotten didn't truly occur to me until the next morning when my eyes popped open and I knew I had to get up, I had to make my way up to the castle. The headmaster likes the teachers who are living away from the grounds to be there unnecessarily earlier than the ones who remain there actually awaken, but.. I went to sit up, momentarily forgetting that instead of opting for the couch last night as I probably should have, given we have yet to discuss the kiss yesterday and anything else pertaining to it, well.. When I went to sit up I found it mission impossible. A long leg was thrown carelessly over my hips, and her face rested gently against my chest.

I felt my cheeks burn hot because I'd apparently forgotten during the night that although we are matched to marry, that doesn't really mean she wants to see me with no shirt on and removed mine after she'd fallen asleep. So I was lying there shirtless being gripped tightly by Celeste. She'd groan now and again in her sleep and once I heard her mutter quietly, "Oh." as she bit her lower lip in her sleep.

I rolled over onto my side carefully, leaned over her. I'd been intending on just waking her up, instead, I settled for brushing a few fallen strands of her soft dark brown hair out and away from her face. She curled into me, sort of and I laughed a little. I was clearly going to have to wake her up to get out of the bed and to the grounds of the castle on time.

"Celeste. You've got to wake up.. Or loosen your hold." I muttered, stifling a yawn myself. Okay, so I admit readily that yes, I could lie here all day but.. We still haven't even spoken about the kisses or anything Lavendar revealed last night. Or what we actually **want**.

"No. Too early." she answered finally, opening her eyes a little, going to sit up in the bed, sheet clenched tightly around her almost as if she'd slept.. I felt my cheeks burn hot again when my eyes darted to the chair that sat at her vanity table and saw the shirt draped carelessly over it's back. She was clenching the sheet around her because she'd obviously slept topless too.

I'd been lying there, in bed.. With a topless girl in my arms and naturally, the only thing that occurs is sleep. I chose not to mention this, of course. I was already flustered enough, not to mention the amout of physical effect it had on me. My face heated.. Could she tell right now? Oh hell, that would be embarassing.. We can barely discuss the kisses we've shared without one or the other of us falling into an awkward pause.. I suppose it's silly, I mean soon enough we'll be married.. And it won't matter anymore.

One look at her revealed quickly that I wasn't the only one who's face was burning hot with embarassment currently. She'd obviously taken off the shirt and thrown it at the chair just before she'd fallen into a deeper level of sleep. We coughed at the same time and for a few seconds there, I said absolutely nothing. She finally did something, however, and while it was tentative, her little 'move' was, it was a move.

She made a move.

She leaned in and pulled my lips to hers, muttered softly, "Good morning." before deepening the kiss. I blinked, stunned at first but instinct came surprisingly quick and easy and I carefully pulled her lips in even deeper as I muttered back, "Good morning. I have to get to the castle."

She pouted a moment and then said with a yawn, "I'll see you tonight. Let me know how today goes, please? I know how much you've always sort of wanted this." to which I nodded and slid out of bed, getting dressed quickly, apparating to the castle, quickly going into the sanctuary of my greenhouse.

I gripped the edges of the tables that lined one of the green house walls and tried to get myself together. I don't have a class first thing in the morning which is probably for the best. I paced the greenhouses neatly lined and spaced rows of plant species and stopped, tended to a few in need and then it was back to pacing again. By the end of the day, almost time to go back to the cottage Irealized, I'd decided that hell or high water.. Tonight, damn it, we were going to actually have the discussion about that night in the towers, those kisses yesterday, what we both actually wanted.

Because there's no way in bloody Merlin I can marry her without just getting it off my chest. And I've come to the realization that maybe she's a little too afraid to admit the same to me? Maybe because my words all those years ago sort of left a mark?

I mean if someone said everything I'd said to her that night to me, yes.. I'd be wary of letting myself admit how I felt about them too. She has to feel something for me, right?

She's snogged me on three seperate occasions by now.. But she's affectionate too. But not that affectionate. While my mind argued over whether she was or wasn't possibly interested in me, I paced the greenhouses. The students had gone on to their dorms by now, I could and probably needed to be going to the cottage.

I finally apparated back to the cottage.

(CELESTE)

I heard the refridgerator opening and I turned around to find Neville leaned against it, his white button up shirt stained with dirt and soil. The sight made me smile a little. I quickly stopped smiling when I realized that something was wrong. "Did today not go well?" I asked, lifting the lid to a pot of pasta, fanning the scent to my nose before adding just a pinch more seasoning to the water as it boiled and frothed around inside of the pot.

He sniffed the air and said with a smile, "You're cooking.. You didn't have to.." as he watched me intently while I moved around the kitchen, checking on the three different pots I had going as I also set the table and poured us both tea to drink. I looked up and turned, said with a shrug and smile, "I wanted to. I'd go stir crazy Neville, sitting around here with nothing to do all day."

He nodded and took this huge sip of the bottle of water in his hands, wiped off his lips as he started towards me, focusing on something intently as he did so. I repeated my question.

The doors locked all over the cottage.

"Neville?"

"I know how flighty you are." he said quietly, looking down into my eyes. I licked my lips and looked up at him and then asked, "And?"

"And maybe it's time we actually talked about things instead of making assumptions or storming away or diversionary tactics to distract us from the things neither of us seem to bother mentioning." he blurted in a rush.

I giggled a little, I couldn't help it, I've never been able to control the awkward moments in which the giggles seem to hit me. He sounded very much like Neville Longbottom, confident and firm Herbology professor right now. I wondered for a moment if he'd get angry if I said something like ' How bad a girl have I been, Professor', but thankfully, I managed to keep the flirtatious remark internal for the moment.

I'd have to remember it. Maybe I could use it later.. Maybe if things ever get to a much less awkward place. I'd spent all day trying to figure out just how the hell this will work really, we're supposed to procreate, I mean I am assuming that the Marriage Decree was largely put into play now to help a depleted population bloom again..

And I've known about the birds and the bees for a long time now so I know that it'll take more than these intense and electrically charged kisses or the accidental falling asleep in his arms to have that very thing happen.

Both could lead to procreation but.. He's shy and I'm... I guess I'm sort of afraid if you really want the truth. I'm afraid that if I do let myself get close to him now then when this is all over, I'll lose him too. Just like I've lost everything else.

Yet there are parts of me, the parts that come out when I do what I'd done last night and when I responded to his kiss and returned it with one of my own last night and this morning, well.. They want me to fall. They want me to let go. And I'm fighting with all my might not to let go.

But I'm losing, damn it.

Lying there in his arms this morning, watching the rise and fall of his chest, curled up against him.. I want this. But I don't just want it for only five years or maybe ten if I'm lucky. I want it until we're both too old to move without the other's help. Until all there is left is him and me and the memories. But practicality insists that I've lost those I love twice now. And it sort of slowly killed me. Do I really think I can stand a third attempt at happiness?

The noodles in the pot started to boil over slightly just as he reached where I stood in the small kitchen. Thank God for small distraction, I suppose. I turned quickly and lowered the temperature on the stove. I stirred the pot a few minutes. I opened the lid on the second pot and was just about to raise the sauce I'd scooped up onto the spoon to my lips to try it, but his hands.. They gripped my hips.

I felt my knees literally going to jelly and my brain stopped working for a few seconds. Those few seconds were all he needed really, to turn me around. He picked me up and sat me on the counter safely away from the stove, looking at me.

"You're nervous." he chuckled a little, looking at me. I took the test bite I'd been about to take while shaking my head, maintaining the perfect innocent facade as I held his gaze and said through a mouth full, "I am not!"

"You are, Celeste."

"Why would I be nervous? Are you sotted right now? That's what this is.. You went to the tavern after classes ended today... Didn't you?" I asked, babbling nervously, mentally kicking myself for doing it. Damn it, this nervous giggling twit is **not** me!

But damn him, he **makes me** this way. Always has.

"Actually, no, Celeste." Neville stated calmly as he took the spoon out of my hand and then said quietly, "We need to talk.."

My stomach churned nervously. It felt like a swarm of bees loose inside my gut. "About?" I asked, trying to play it clueless.

"Well.. You kissed me like that this morning.. And I kissed you the way I did yesterday." Neville started. A moments hesitation flashed in those eyes of his and I sighed and then nodded. "We did.."

"I think, Celeste, that things may have gotten said that night. Things that I know I didn't mean. Especially now, reconnecting with you after all this time." Neville admitted. My heartrate picked up wildly, I could almost hear it's steady thumping rhythym against my ears.

"I didn't mean the things I said back either. I did mean every single word I said when you first walked in that night." I admitted finally. My brain was arguing me right now, I was in an internal uproar.. But maybe if we got all this out tonight, got it out now.. We could finally stop having all the little awkward moments. Things would at least feel a little less forced or faked when we did have to marry in another month.

"I know that now. I wish I'd known that then." he admitted. His voice came out thick, husky.. His eyes flashed with this strange look in them as he looked at me a few moments. I bit my lower lip as I tried not to focus on just how he stood in front of me, how I was currently sitting in front of him on the counter, my legs at his hips. My throat was on the verge of closing and I. **.**... Not even a little.

"Would have made things much easier, I suppose." I muttered as I shifted my steady gaze off of those lips of his and upward to his eyes which were staring into mine.

"This doesn't have to be awkward." he repeated for probably the fourth time since this all began a few weeks ago.

"It could be as natural as breathing." I muttered in response as my fingertip trailed slowly over his lower lip. His index fingertip trailed over my lower lip also and he said quietly, "It could. Maybe if we don't overthink everything.. I just need to know one thing.."

"Yes?"

"Do you still feel anything you said to me that night in the tower now?" he asked.

I nodded quietly.

"Maybe we just let things sort of happen?" I suggested quietly, looking up at him after a few seconds of staring down at my bare feet. He coughed a little and nodded. " I didn't mean anything I said to you that night." he said next as he held my gaze, concentrating, it was almost like he was staring at me intently and sort of willing me to know he meant that.

And I could sense that yes, he did.

"I'm just afraid, Neville.. When you get used to losing everyone you care about, it makes things harder." I admitted. He nodded and said quietly, "I know.." and I nodded. His parents, they weren't dead to him, but they were in catatonic states at St. Mungos. He'd basically had to grow up alone.. No father to ask for proper dating advice.. No mum to console him when things got so horrible at the end of the war.

"I do know one thing." he admitted next, looking at me again.

"What's that?"

"I know what I want to happen."

"As do I.. Just afraid to actually say it just yet, fearing it might hex things." I admitted quietly, holding his gaze.

This slow burn filled my veins and settled in my stomach. Neville when he's like this, firm and confident and so sure of things.. It's something, it brings out this whole other side to the gentle and mild mannered Neville I fell so hard for all those years ago. The one I'm still so crazy about now, even if I'm scared to death to admit it.

"Me too." he admitted quietly, looking at me. Leaning upward, against him, I muttered against his lips, "Slowly is best.. But I do want things to work out differently than I'm afraid they will."

"Which is how?" he asked, his lips brushing against mine as he spoke.

"When this is over, you'll want it to be over.." I admitted finally. Knowing I'd admitted that, it literally gave him all the power to hurt me.

It was something I was wary of doing.

"I was thinking the same.. But about me.. I'm me, you know. Nothing's different." Neville muttered as he pulled my lips deeper into his, both of us falling silent for the duration of the kiss.

A loud clap and pop of thunder and lightning sounded outside and lit up the night sky. I've never been crazy about storms. I flinched and leaned into him, he chuckled. "Just a little storm."

"I hate them though."

"Why? I've always sort of found the lightning to be interesting, pretty to look at."

"But deadly, Neville, very deadly."

He shook his head, scooped me off the countertop and sat me down in one of the chairs at the table in the dining room. "I'm starved." he admitted.

I laughed and nodded, admitted, "Me too." and for a moment, our eyes met and we knew.. Things were out now. From now on, things would be a lot different. Strange, thrilling and scary as hell, but different.


End file.
